So much out there in the media about this "sexual addiction" Crap! Largely due to these mainstream politicians, and, or high profile members of the, oh not-so-holy, Clergy! Anyway, caught this pretty well written, and highly informative article making some great distinctions. So, I decided to share some of it with you. Further down I 'cut and pasted' a few paragraphs, directly, from the article.
I know many of my clients, future clients, and maybe just some of my readers here probably have had some of these thoughts or questions enter their own heads too at some point. Honestly, though, most of the men I have seen walk through my doors, get that having feelings for another man, in addition to the wife they love, has nothing to do with any addiction of any type, but every once in a while I get one or two that come in questioning, feeling a bit
guilty, and maybe even still wondering before they see me.
Now, once they spend time with me and experience our time together, they often walk away feeling far more secure, confident, maybe even a bit more self assured even. This is not to say however, that once they get back to their lives, and get hit with all the same familial beliefs, and daily circumstances, they won't go back to having some of the same conflicting thoughts and emotions. This is precisely why I decided this little well written, highly informative piece would be a worthwhile read for some of you out here in my blog 0 sphere.
I highlighted some of the bullet points I felt stood out to me, and worth pointing out, specifically targeting some of my reading audience.
So please do read, enjoy, live, grow, learn, and continue to explore, and allow yourselves to Fully Embrace and Experience, all of your sexuality. It is truly a wonderful gift to be able to feel fully loved and nurtured, as well as to be able to care for and nurture another man and or a woman of your choice, at whatever moment in your life, and at whatever time of your life.
And, Yes! Even if it's all happening simultaneously. And yes, especially if, and when your wife no longer wishes to have sex with you. Your life as a man should not be a sexual death sentence. You feel great after sex with a man? Go out and have it!
Your life is NOT a dress rehearsal. You deserve to feel whole and complete, and if being in the arms of another man makes you feel this way? Then go ahead and let it happen! Lots of Grey my friends! Lots of Grey. Things are not always as they seem!
"Plenty of well-meaning but under-informed therapists are willing to label all sorts of things as sexual addiction.
Frankly, the mental health profession provides minimal training in terms of what constitutes healthy (and unhealthy) human sexual behavior. Because of this, some therapists mistakenly believe that any form of sex/gender driven dysphoria equates to sexual addiction. This is simply not the case.
The fact that an individual feels bad about his or her sexualized thoughts, feelings, desires, or actions does not mean that he or she is a sex addict. That individual might be a sex addict, but only if the above-stated criteria (obsession, loss of control, and negative consequences) are met.
Rule Outs…
- Sexual Orientation ≠ Sex Addiction
However, changing one’s arousal template is not possible. If you’re attracted to men, that’s the way it is; if you’re attracted to women, same story; and if you like both genders, you’d better get used to it, because that’s not going change no matter how much analysis you have or how many 12-step meetings you attend.
In other words, sexual addiction is not in any way defined by who it is that turns you on."
Complete Article below can be found on psychcentral.com
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